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Destinations, Middle East

NEFERTERI, QUEEN OF EGYPT

February 10, 2009 • By

I’ve decided since I was such a big hit at the Egyptian party I would go ahead and assume a new identity. From this day forward, please refer to me as Nefertiti, the Queen of Egypt. I also like the Queen of the Nile but there is a bit too much pollution in the river and we all know I can’t have any references to anything less than perfect. The ancient Egyptians declared themselves gods and kings all the time why can’t I? It seems like a pretty straightforward process. Now I need some sucker willing to spend the next 25 years chiseling me a temple. I think my boat mates referring to me as the beautiful Nefertiti may have gone to my head. Egyptians dig me. It’s fun to be admired and even the boat crew wanted to take my picture. Of course I was totally into posing like an Egyptian with the cobra movements and all. I even have the pictures to prove it. (I did indeed pay $6 for pictures of myself). I guess my brother thinks I’ve lost my mind but I contend it’s been years in the making as I was completely overlooked as homecoming queen in high school. (NO I AM NOT BITTER).

Our Egyptian party was a total blast. The DJ played music and we slithered around practicing our belly dancing moves to Egyptian hip-hop. Couples played a “dirty” game –I thought as we are in a Muslim country– the men wore blindfolds and pinched a beer bottle in between their legs maneuvering forward based on the awaiting woman’s directions. The key was for the man to pour his beer into the woman’s glass. Basically, this was a crotch-to-crotch game or as an onlooker exclaimed, “OH there’s beer in his glass and he poured it all over her pants.” Obviously she never played kings or pyramid or even quarters for that matter. Didn’t they have that game in 1930?

As the Queen, I participated in the single ladies game and something more appropriate for royalty. I won a bottle of water (a real jewel in Egypt). When the thumping music stopped, I was item less which meant I was the winner. Mind you there were 3 of us left so we all won. Our boat was big on prizes.

The only remaining mystery of my Nile Cruise involved a 20 something year old guy who seemed to accompany 7 other 70+ women. He never left their side dining with them at every meal, tanning and swimming with them on the boat and accompanying them to bed much earlier than anyone his age. My group had various theories…caretaker, grandson, son, etc. By the end of the trip, I got everyone to agree on “servicer.” This was after I pointed out he carried her purse on several occasions and I didn’t see many sex pot 70+ year old women frolicking in the sun in high heels. I tried like crazy to figure it out and my group decided I needed to corner him. It was a tough mission as he never left his lady’s side but the last night he wore a t-shirt that read, “I’m a Virgin.” I saw my chance. Half way out the door and alone I shouted to him, “hey how could you be a virgin when you’re on a cruise with 7 women?” His response left me speechless; “there’s always room for 8.”  I guess he told me.

My boat docked in the magical land of Luxor, former Kingdom of Thebes. It’s about 4 hours from Aswan and 11 from Cairo. It’s quite a historical city as it’s filled with some of the most magnificent ruins to ever be discovered. Egyptologists and archaeologists continue to find new remains on a fairly regular basis.

The city is divided by the Nile. The East Bank is the main thoroughfare of the city and contains two towering temples called the Temple of Karnak and the Temple of Luxor. The West Bank is home to the Valley of the Kings, the site for many of the tombs of pharaohs from the New Kingdom, including Tutankhamen and Ramses the Great.  Much of these sites has been amazingly preserved.  It is my feeling that these works are even more impressive than the pyramids.  To see the workmanship on the walls at the Valley of the Kings is almost unbelievable.  Imagine coming to work each day -blindfolded by the priests (so they never knew the exact location) and crafting the tomb of a king. These people worked in low light and likely desert conditions chiseling these hieroglyphics masterpieces.

Thirty-seven tombs have been discovered at the Valley of the Kings and most of the insides are still very much intact. The colors on the walls in addition to the “artwork” are gorgeous.  The ancient Egyptians possessed wisdom unmatched by anyone of their time and I might go as far to say no single group has come close since that time (I haven’t been to India yet so we’ll see).

Another little factoid worth sharing about the ancient Egyptians involves the sun. They believed the sun died every night in the west and was reborn each morning in the east. Hence, the temples celebrating life are located on the East Bank and the tombs embracing death on the West Bank. This also confirms their understanding of life and death. Everything dies but comes back again.

The Temple of Karnak is an equally empowering visit and I would have loved to see its splendor in the day.  Completed entirely in Egyptian style there are columns a fixed with the lotus and the papyrus– powerful Egyptian symbols even now.  The temple’s columns are immense and I cannot do it justice on paper. It’s the size of two football fields with statues and columns sectioning off various worship rooms. Ancient Egyptians built their temples from the inside and out so likely columns and rooms were added over hundreds of years.  The temple also houses a few remaining obelisks. The rest have been stolen, destroyed or reside in other countries.  There is one particular granite slab that I paid great attention to at the Temple. It represents the god of marriage. The legend says a woman who walked around the statue 7 times would soon find herself married. I did make the obligatory walk. It can’t hurt might help. Don’t worry I skipped the god of fertility’s slab. I figure I have enough problems right now.

I’m boarding the mouse-infested train back to Cairo. THE TRAIN I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR 3 HOURS TO TAKE BECAUSE I DIDN’T KNOW 21:50 WAS 9:50 AND GOT HERE IN PLENTY OF TIME FOR THE 8:50. The train that just cost me an extra $20 in baksheesh tips to use the toilet and get some tea. These people are persistent.

Before I sign off, here are a few more Egyptianisms:

Me to our guide: Do your “priests” or whatever they’re called have to try out to speak 5 times a day on the megaphone?
Guide: (very pissed off). We don’t have priests.

Me: I know but your leaders or whatever. The calls to prayer– I mean don’t people have alarm clocks?
Guide: They have clocks this is just a reminder.

Me: Well it’s really annoying and I think if someone doesn’t want to pray they should not be forced to.
Guide: It’s ok that you don’t live here then and you should know the voices are much better than they used to be.

Me: Great so they used to be loud, annoying and tone deaf.
Guide: Silence.

Haggler: Felucca, motorboat, taxi, horse carriage? Maybe tomorrow.
Me: maybe never

New Haggler: Felucca, motorboat, taxi, horse carriage?
Me: (turning around in haggler’s face) where you from? $1, 5 Egyptian pounds, maybe tomorrow, felucca?
Haggler: Speechless
Haggler friend: laughing hysterical
Me: priceless


Africa, Destinations, Middle East

The Mighty Nile

February 8, 2009 • By

After being bombarded by felucca sellers in Aswan, I boarded by Nile cruise bound for Luxor. Aswan is truly a beautiful spot in Egypt.  It’s about 3 hours from the Sudan border and the widest part of the Nile.  A picturesque scene with hill tops and surrounding ruins, it’s home to the Nubian community many who found their homes wiped out by the construction of the Aswan High Dam in the 70s.  The Nubian’s look a bit more like continental African’s than Egyptians possessing a darker skin tone.  They were farmers and depended on the Nile’s flooding waters for their crops, which meant when the Dam was completed they were not only homeless their way of life vanished.  Now instead of farming, many of them depend on tourism for survival.

In addition to displacing the Nubian people, the Dam also flooded many ancient ruins several saved with the help of UNESCO but many are sitting deep under the Nile’s waters or Lake Nasser (man made by the Dam).  Fortunately, the larger of the ancient temples like Abu Simbel and Philae were cut into pieces and reassembled on higher ground.  The temples are powerful examples of ancient Egyptian life….Abu Simbel consists of 4 towering statues of Ramses II and sits at the foot of Lake Nasser.  Inside the temple, there are amazing hieroglyphics of the King receiving gifts, the Falcon – god of sky, etc.  Philae while created by the Greeks and then finished by the Romans —at the hands of Egyptian workers, is a complex network of columns and hieroglyphic engraving on the banks of the Nile.

I am still enjoying seeing many of the ancient Egyptian ruins.  Each is a marvel in itself.  It is difficult to grasp how advanced the people were at this time.  Without taking into account the history the hieroglyphics give us, the towering temples, the artwork and the forces of nature against the people, they were also a deeply superstitious people.  It’s a little ironic that the ancient people were so deeply afraid of the the gods when really they should have feared each other or the high priests.

I’ve also learned a little bit about Egyptian culture on my stay here.  The one word that keeps popping up every few minutes is the Egyptian word baksheesh, which means TIP.   As a tourist, TIP is something I am expected to do often.  It has become abundantly clear that the driver in Egypt is likely making more money than the travel woman who booked my $1,500 tour.  Even though I’ve paid for all the services, I am required to tip the driver, the guide and anyone who I ask to take a picture.  If  I walk past someone and don’t want to take a felucca ride,  I should pay him to leave me alone.  The tourist police are a joke as I’ve come to the conclusion it’s just a ploy to put more people to work.  The tourist police probably make a salary and then they accost tourists who then pay them to go away.  Another bit of warning, when a shop seller says, ” it’s freeeee or just $1 or only 5 Egyptian pounds.”  He is LYING.  He is also lying when he says, “you come to my shop and just look.”  That means you will be surrounded by shop sellers who will not let you leave the store.  At one point, I had to be rescued as I needed a very cute hat for my Cleopatra outfit (more later) and I literally had to duck out of a circle of Egyptian men dressing me in all sorts of belly dancing outfits and Egyptian style dresses.  My new South African friend had to put her arms up to get me out as I was yelling for these men to get away from me.  Needless to say, the sellers are aggressive. 

Back on the boat, I’ve enjoyed incredible views of the Nile.  It’s hard to imagine 90 percent of Egypt is desert when I see the vastness of the Nile.  Just sailing along and watching the people at her shores it’s hard not to imagine the Nile’s power in ancient times.  People feared her and respected her.  Originating from the waters of Lake Tana in Ethiopia and Lake Victoria in Tanzania, Uganda and Kenya.  She comes to life in Sudan where the Blue Nile and White Nile Rivers join.  The Nile flows all the way to the Mediterranean Sea and more than anything the Nile is Egypt.

I’ve enjoyed my boat mates immensely.  My table consists of a lone Irishman, an older couple from the UK and another couple my age from Toronto.  Since there is always one, we are the problem group and prove to be an interesting mix.  The Irish party boy, the reserved English couple(both teachers) and the young at heart, still madly in love (almost)newlyweds and the brave traveler (that’s apparently me).  After the first night, we also allowed a crazy South African couple from Durban to join us.  It seems the rest of the boat is a bit stiff so it’s likely they sought out a more lively group.

During the day, we sail along the Nile and tour temples but at night we are overfed with international cuisine and entertained by Egyptian performers.  The first night the entertainment consisted of Nubian dancers.  Of course being the single blond girl, I was picked to assist the performer.  He was dressed in bright colors and looked like a joker.  With some paw like hand movements and some yelling like yeee, mooosh, shoosh, this toothless performer had me jumping up and down and trying to repeat whatever it is he said.  He quickly figured out I was hopeless.  Always the performer myself, I made up my own sounds and movements causing the crowd to erupt in laughter.  I don’t think my Nubian prince liked being upstaged so he demanded me fall to my knees.  Well that hurt so I stood up again and he gave me a Haaawwww sound which I took to mean he was not happy but I continued standing and then Haaaawww’d back at him.  After some back and forth of mooosh and Haaaawww and yeeeee haaaawwww, he bowed at me and I bowed back.  That was enough fun for the night.

There are about 60 people on the boat and the average age is probably 70, which means lights out at 10:30.  Immediately following the nightly performances, a herd of 50 people get up and sort of hobble down the stairs to their cabins.  My group stays behind and talks about them and shortly thereafter we make our way to bed.  Last night, there was a battle over a grueling game of BINGO.  I couldn’t stop laughing as I looked around and realized some tables had 7-10 cards.  It was all very serious.  My group did not participate in the game.  We declared in advance we were there for moral support to the senior citizens.  All I could think is please God don’t ever let this be me.  Anway, with several winners the announcer declared we would have a runoff for the loser.  Suddenly, there were 4 people on the 8×10 dance floor with their cards in tow.  One by one went down until the number 72 was shouted out and a woman SCREAMED Bingo.  When the game was over, like clock work the herd stood up and scrambeled to bed.  Apparently I started singing a little too loudly, “So long, farewell Auf Wiedersehen, goodnight…”  and again my group burst out laughing and joined in my rendition from the Sound of Music. 

Tonight is our big Egyptian farewell.  I will be dressing as Cleopatra in a beautiful Galbya dress.  This is known as fancy dress in Egypt.  I’m so excited I bought two head pieces in case one didn’t work.  The store owner on the boat was very excited to tie my head piece.  Following in the foot steps of the other Egyptian men, he had to touch my hair…”Oh you have such beautiful hair.”  The poor guy doesn’t know I don’t have my mommy on board and he will be tying my head piece again later.